Side Quests: Grilled Pineapple

Sometimes I get a good idea out of the blue. I'll never be super creative or super talented; nor will this blog probably be read by anyone but my friends. Nevertheless, sometimes I come up with something so delicious that I wish I could have everyone try it at home. This is one such recipe. I'm putting it under Side Quests (side dishes lol, in case you haven't gotten that) but really, if you put it over fried or white rice and had another side dish I think it could be a meal. It is vegan, GF (if you use tamari), and totally delicious! I don't think you'll be disappointed. I was inspired by the SUPER FANCY soy sauce that Sistor got me to make this pork belly recipe. It is the most delicious soy sauce I've ever tasted. I made tofu with tangerine sauce using it and DAMN it was good! It's very rich and not as salty, just umami galore. If you has an Asian market look for it, otherwise Sistor got it from Amazon.

Sooo good

Ingredients:
1/2 fresh ripe pineapple
3/4 c. Superior Dark Soy Sauce (or tamari for GF,or regular but booo regular)
1 t. brown sugar
1 t. mirin (rice wine)
1 t. sesame oil

Simple

Slice the pineapple into plankettes or half plankettes (both shown). It doesn't really matter what size, as long as they're flattish.The half pineapple should make 4 plankettes or 8 half p's.

P's and half p's.

Combine the rest of the ingredients in a Ziploc and let marinate for 30-60 mins.

Squish it around a little

Heat a grill pan or nonstick pan on medium and spray with cooking spray- pref. grapeseed. When hot enough to sizzle, throw your pineapples on and grill until tender; flipping multiple times throughtout to caramelize the outside. You'll know they're tender when your grab them with tongs and they flop over like a- well.... nevermind. Don't use superhigh heat- sadly then the sesame oil from the marinade will burn, since it has loooow smokepoint. Just be patient with the medium ;)

Use a nonstick if you don't have grillpan

Serve atop white rice, or add to a stir fry at the end. Or just eat as is. Lol. The combo of sweet, salty, and savory is really awesome in this recipe. Try it!!!! You know ya want to.

Yay!

Recent Eats: +1 in Cooking

This is a new type of post for me. I've been cooking up a storm the past couple and here are the things I've made that I can fully endorse!

This from a blog I follow regularly. I subbed the ground beef with ground chicken and 2 baby bellas I chopped superfine (attempt at mimicking savoriness of beef). I also used jasmine rice- it was quite tasty. For the vegetarian version I'd use veg stock and a pound of chopped mushrooms, or sub in meatless grounds. These taste the best out of many I've tried.

She calls it grownup beefaroni lol

Fried catfish, Bacony Brussels, skillet potatoes, and Capered Tartar Sauce.

Verry fancy biz

 It was my first ever time frying catfish, and it turned out well. I used Crisco lol and do not own a thermometer so the oil temp was all guesswork. Was damn good guessing, let me tell you ha ha ha. This was literally the best meal I've made in a couple years.

And a grill pan lol

No-Alarm Tofu and Two Bean Chili. No alarms because of the Shrubs. Mine I gussied up with some Frank's. Mmmm. This was also quite tasty, and I am not generally a chili fan, unless it comes from a can and is on top of a hot dog heh. If I'd had any left over, I would've made "chilitos" which is what my mom did  when I was a kid and we were poor. Chili in a tortilla with cheese lol. Ah, memories.

Sooo healthy

Cheesy Potato soup. I've attempted to make cheesy potato or broccoli soups in the past, only to have them turn out grainy and have the cheese separate in tiny lumps. Apparently the trick is to make a bechamel and add it BEFORE you add the cheese! Wut??! Also tasty, but I overcooked the tatoes.

More like cream o' potato

Last but not least, a pretty pie for some pretty girl I know ;) She thought it was quite good.

 +1 charisma ;)

 If you want the recipes for anything you see here, let me know in the comments!

Side Quests: Raspberry and Blueberry Corn Muffins

I've been on a corn muffin kick lately, and luckily this recipe is waitforit... BERRY EASY ahahahahha. I chose to make them more on the sweet side, but with a couple changes they can be easily adapted to savory. Should make an even dozen.

Ingredients:
1 &1/4 c. flour (also tried GF with this flour they were as good as original!)
3/4 c. cornmeal, either yellow or white is fine (If you want a heavier, less cakey muffin, or more "typical" cornbread just do 1c flour and 1c corn)
1 T. baking powder
1 tsp. salt
1/3 c. sugar (savory muffins 2 T.)
2 eggs
3 T. honey (savory muffins 1T or leave out)
3/4 c. milk of any sort (I've used 2% and whole, both fine)
8 T. butter, melted (think that's 1/2 cup...? can sub in veggie oil)
Berries of your choice- 36 raspberries or or 48 blueberries
 **Ideas for savory addins: 6 strips cooked crumbled bacon; 1 c. corn kernels; couple oz. diced jalapenos or green chiles;1 c. shredded cheddar etc etc**

A winning hand

In a largish bowl, mix all the dry ingredients up with a whisk. Actually, a fork works just fine too.

Forgive my phone camera

In another bowl, whisk (fork haha) together the eggs, honey, milk. ( and corn or chz if you went that route)

Honey is stiff, so blend well!

Make a well in the center of the dry bowl, and pour in eggmilk mix:

Eggmilk.

Then butta:

No lobster to go with this boo :(

Stir by hand until combined, but don't overstir cuz your buns will be tough ;)

Lumpy is fine

Pour into greased, sprayed, or papered muffin tin (or a pan if you want bread instead of muffins.)

I had unfortunate berry incident- most all were rotten :(

Get the hell outta here

Dot the tops with the berries (or bacon, or chilies yumm)

Just push them in slightly.

Bake at preheated 350 for 15-20 or until toothpick comes out clean.

Yummmmmm

Stuff yo face. You're welcome.

Side Quests: White Trash Chile Relleno Casserole

Secret shame time! I loooooooove white trash meals. Chili dogs, Hamburger Helper, meatloaf, Salisbury steak, any sort of casserole that involves canned soup... you name it, if it's cheap and salty and something your mom probably made I will nom the hell out of it. As white trash casseroles go, this one is not too terribly unhealthy, but ohhh soooo delicioussssssss. In fact, I would totally eat it as a main dish. I'm not too proud.

Ingredients:
1 c. Bisquick
2 eggs
2 c. milk
16 oz. grated sharp or extra sharp cheddar
The big boy can green chiles (fire roasted, or once again if you have fresh roasted then dooo it!)

Gonna be SO GOOD

Start by layering the chiles in a 9x13 that has been cooking sprayed like soooo:

Aim for no uncovered spots

 Mix up the eggs, milk, an Bisquick. Cover the chiles with the cheese then dump the Bisquick mix over the top all willy-nilly:

And bake at 375 for 35-40 or the top is as brown as you like:

Yumyumyumyumyum

 Such a perfect blend of cheese and peppers and fluffy amazingness OMG white trash casseroles I love you so much!!!! You know it must be good if I'm willing to admit my secret shame.

*faints*

Side Quests: Twice Baked Potatoes, VF Style

I demand that you don't just walk, or mosey, or saunter to the kitchen to make these. RUN, dammit. These tatos are gold. Er, if you could eat gold, I guess. The key to their crack-like deliciousness is my lil twist on the recipe, and my secret . Well, I'm sharing it with you now so guess not so secret, huh?

Ingredients:
4 large russet or Yukon Gold potatoes (Russet safe choice, but Yukons reallly elevate this recipe.)
1/2 brick cream cheese (4 ounces I think?)
1/2 stick butter, softened (yes, butter. Don't even consider margarine. Heathen.)
3 generous T. sour cream
1/2 cup grated extra sharp cheddar, plus more to top
1/4 tsp. poultry seasoning (wow, I sure use that a lot, huh?)
1/4 tsp. garlic salt, plus 1 sprinkle regular salt
2 T. fresh parsley, minced (please use fresh. It truly makes a difference.)
plenty shakes of black pepper
paprika, to taste (I go heavy.)

Out of my fave sour cream, boo :(

Scrub your tatos, poke 'em a few times wif knife/ fork/ your teeth and bake in the oven or microwave til tender. I prefer the microwave, because it's so easy, but be sure to check 'em by stabbing to make sure they're done all the way through. Microwave takes 15 minutes vs. the oven, which clocks in at like, an hour. Once they're cool, slice the tops off and hollow them out with a spoon-transferring the tato innards into a mixing bowl. Try to keep the potato shape intact.

Shallow husks lol.

To the bowl of tatos add the poultry season, butter, sour cream, garlic salt/salt sprinkle, pepper, 1/2 cup cheddar, and parsley. Blend thoroughly:

Fill  the shallow husks  with the mixture about halfway. NOW. Here is my secret. Cut off a good piece (bout thumb size chunk) of the cream cheese and nestle it into the filling like so:

Delicious results await you.

Really mold the chunks into the base filling. And then top wif more filling, sealing the cream chz in:

Almost there!

Lastly, top wif sprinkle cheddar an the (generous) paprika:

Or even sprinkle of red pepper, if you feelin froggy lol.

Pop into 375 oven an bake until tops of tatos browned, (about 35 minutes).

Well hot damn.

The implementation of the secret tip means you get tatos with their centers full of warm, gooey goodness.... Lord these are tasty. Might as well make a double batch because you'll WISH you had more the next day.

Chicken Kiev (aka, fireworks on date night!)

Bad news. This recipe is entirely too much work. Still, I encourage you to try it at least once- because it is damn delicious. Alternatively, if you needed to bust out a meal to impress a date, or as a special dinner for you and your SO- this would be it. :) Let's get this fancypants show on the road.

Ingredients:
4 boneless skinless chicken breasts (thin sliced is good, less pounding later....lol...)
1/2 stick butter
poultry seasoning
garlic powder
salt
white pepper (black is okay too, but white is a little more delicate alongside the poultry.)
fresh parsley
3 eggs (to be on the safe side.)
1 c. all-purpose flour
1-1 1/2 c. plain breadcrumbs
few T. olive oil for browning

Equipment:
meat mallet (or whatever else you may have to smack the chicken.)
plastic wrap
toothpicks





                  Behold.







On to the hard work now. Rinse and dry the chicken.  Place each piece of meat between two sheets of plastic wrap and hammer until flattened (without making holes). Try to hammer it into a rectangular shape if you can.

Fail. Oh well. Kinda rectangular...

Peel back the top sheet of wrap and season yo breast. Sprinkle on poultry seasoning, garlic, salt, pepper and parsley- as much or as little as you like. Cut the 1/2 stick butter into fourths- matchstick style- and place one matchstick right in middle of the chicken.

Easiest part of this recipe.

NOW. Tuck the short sides of the rectangle (the top and bottom in above pic) up against the butter and then roll from left to right until the butter is encased in almost a purse-like manner. Use your toothpicks to secure the meat around the butta and seasonings like soooo:

Jelly roll style.

As soon as they're all rolled up, chill in fridge for about 10-15 minutes (this ensures that the butter doesn't melt out too soon). Meanwhile get your dipping station ready (flour egg and crumbs) and heat a couple T. olive oil in a skillet over medium.Get your meaty rolls out and flour, egg, crumb (in that order) to coat:

The messiest.

Pop into the skillet and brown all four sides (DON'T cook all the way through!)

Luckily they thick enough to stand on all four sides.

Once browned, place those guys into a baking dish and bake at 365. After 15 minutes pull the pan out, tilt at an angle, and spoon the juicy good stuff that's collected back up over top of the rolls:

Omfg delicious butta runoff...

Bake for another 15 (basting again at the 7 minute mark if you like) and bam. All your hard work looks like this:

Lord have mercy...

Plate and spoon the pan juices over the chicken.

Tip: Cut chicken up to detect all hidden toothpicks :)

BOOM. You're gettin some date night lovin, guaranteed.

Side Quests: Crazy Good Cheddar Garlic Biscuits

You've been to Red Lobster right? And sampled their bland rubbery seafood that all tastes  suspiciously similar (and sometimes like bleach)? I'm a firm believer that the only reason to darken a RL's door is for their endless baskets of Cheddar Bay Biscuits. Lordy. Well! I've got greeaaattt news.

These are Cheddar Bay Biscuits taken up several notches (nomtches?)...bready cheesy garlic-y NOMS. Legit biscuits that taste like CBBs but like, times an assload of deliciousness points. And you can see what you're making them with. Unlike the tasty devils who materialize at your table, that feature a sketch abundance of (God only knows) monstrously unhealthy/chemically altered ingredients.

Ingredients:
2 c. all-purpose flour + 3 additional T.
1/2 cup olive oil (I used classic, no extra virgin for this recipe.)
1 cup milk (whole please.) 
2 eggs
4 tsp. baking powder
1/4-1/2 tsp. garlic powder (depending on how garlic-y you like your biskies.)
2-3 T. minced fresh or dried parsley (I used fresh.)
1/2 tsp. salt
several grinds/shakes black pepper
16 oz. EXTRA SHARP cheddar-grated (more if you feel like fat kid!)
   -greased/cooking sprayed muffin tin, or cupcake holders to go in muffin tin

Combine flour, baking powder, salt and pepper in a large bowl- set aside. In another mixing bowl combine oil, milk, eggs, garlic powder, and parsley; blending in the cheese. Dump the wet into the dry:

And mix JUST until combined. Don't overmix.

Lumps of flour are juuuust fine.

Spoon into your tins

I really need to ditch this ugly bakeware :\

and bake at 450 for 10 mins, or (as always) tops are as golden brown as you like. Alternately, you can stab em wif a toothpick. Clean toothpick, done biskies.

Serving size = twelve, right?

Oh dear God.... Prepare yourself for biskie coma >.<